A year ago today, the Hubs and I decided we wanted to be “overly cautious” in case this Covid thing was more serious than everyone thought. We decided to pull our kids out of school a year ago. The next day schools closed anyway. A week later the Hubs was laid off. We never ran out of toilet paper because my mom, sister and I had went to Costco in early February and stocked up on household goods then. We figured if it turned out to be nothing, we would have 4 months worth of stuff.
In a lot of ways, lockdown has just felt like how I normally do life anyway. (Except for doctor appointments moving online, and I vote with keep and increase access to Telehealth!)
I stay home, especially during flu season, since I have a compromised immune system. I stay inside when it’s too warm. I try to find things to keep me entertained inside…crafts, tracing my ancestry, baking, etc. I try to keep my stress levels low (which was kind of hard to do during a global pandemic…)
We tried to make the most of this family time together. I had always wanted to watch all the Marvel movies in order, so we did. Then my son said he wanted to watch all the Star Wars movies in order, so we did. My daughter and the Hubs re-watched all of Stranger Things episodes in one weekend. I never got around to watching Tiger King. It’s still in my suggestions on Netflix.
It wasn’t all easy. I am an extrovert. I crave interaction with people. The first 3 months of lockdown was fine, maybe even fun. The hubs taught me to play darts, we had numerous backyard bonfires and looking at the stars (It’s normally to cloudy/smoggy to see from our house but the sky was really clear when everyone was staying home.) My kids learned to code and animate and they are both really good at it.
The farther we got into Lockdown, the more depressed I got. I did not want to go for drives as there was no destination to explore at the end because we couldn’t explore with a virus looming. I didn’t want to be out around people because I was trying to stay away from a virus I couldn’t see. We did go to the beach twice. Both times we arrived at 8 am and once people also started coming, we left. My anxiety would start racing, my heart pounding. I know my family would have wanted to stay longer but they understood when I would say it was time to go.
When school started up in August for my kids, I was really grateful for the structure and routine. Online school has been better and difficult for my kids in different ways.
Since California is moving into the red tier of infections, schools are figuring out how to be hybrid of online and in person classes. After lots of discussion, the Hubs and I decided we will send the kids back to school in person in April. It will only be twice a week for a few hours each day. This was not an easy decision. My family lost someone very important to us to Covid. Someone else I love very much caught it and almost died. The paramedics came and agreed that he was in very bad shape but said there were no beds available at any hospitals to take him too. Eventually, he pulled through a few days later. To send my most precious babies back before they have been vaccinated or our being vaccinated is scary but their mental health has to be the priority now.
I just want to remind you to be kind to yourself.
In this past year, if you didn’t get a novel written, if you didn’t learn to make sourdough, if you didn’t watch all episodes of Friends, if you didn’t wear pants to every Zoom meeting you had, if you killed a houseplant, if you ordered more ice cream for porch delivery than you want to admit, if you didn’t shower daily, however YOU made it through this year, you did it and you did it just fine.
Stay safe and Love on Other People.
MSfit Momma 
Sarah, I soooo relate to EVERYTHING you wrote! In February 2020, I too, became a prepper. I didn’t clean shelves off, but I bought enough household supplies for 4 months; food for 3+ months; an additional freezer; puzzles; cough syrups & decongestants. I felt like a nut and people around me felt I was going too far. I went up the hill to Apple Valley on the 5th of March and told the MS group that I didn’t think we would be meeting again for a few months. I also told them that they should prepare to be home for a couple months. I cancelled the Riverside MS Support Group meeting that was scheduled for March 7th. The Riverside group meets in a medical facility and I didn’t feel comfortable exposing myself and 30 others to what was spreading.
My family & I (5 adults) managed to not hate each other after being “together” for a year. There are projects we completed and there are several we didn’t. We aren’t going to stress any of it. COVID and it’s insidious variants are stressful enough. Like you, I have no B-cells and I have just about all of the comorbidities that can lead to the least favorable outcome. I see vaccines as helpful, but they won’t mitigate the virus. People are wanting to rush back to “normal” when 18 months ago people were complaining about whatever their “normal” was.
I will continue to have you in my prayers. I know the children will do well when they return to school. The vaccine will be available to them soon. I know that widening your bubble is difficult. My daughter is a nurse and she comes in and out everyday. It can be terrifying! but, please continue to make each day special & love those that love you!
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